Emotional Changes After Birth: What’s normal and what’s not
Hey mama,
Let me be honest, those first weeks after bringing a baby home are intense. I remember sitting on the couch after my first was born, completely exhausted, my emotions swinging from pure joy to sheer panic in a matter of minutes. By my second baby, I thought I knew what to expect, but being a military spouse added a whole new layer. Deployments, moves, and not having family nearby meant I often felt like I was doing it all alone.
Here’s what I want you to know: it’s completely normal to feel a mix of emotions after birth. Some days you might feel joyful and proud, other days tearful, anxious, or overwhelmed. Mood swings, irritability over little things, and even moments of “am I doing this right?” are all part of adjusting to a huge life change.
But there are times when emotions aren’t just the normal postpartum rollercoaster:
Feeling sad, hopeless, or empty for most of the day, every day
Anxiety or panic that keeps you from functioning
Feeling detached from your baby or unable to bond
Thoughts of harming yourself or your baby
If you notice any of these, it’s important to reach out for help, to your provider, a therapist, or a support person. Postpartum depression and anxiety are common and treatable, and getting help is a sign of strength.
From my experience, a few things really made a difference:
Talking about it: Even if it’s just a few sentences to your partner or a friend, it helps you feel less alone.
Accepting help: I had people bring meals, do laundry, or just hold the baby so I could shower. Those small acts made a huge difference.
Giving myself grace: Some days you’ll feel like you’re failing, and some days you’ll feel like you’ve got this. Both are okay.
Professional support: Checking in with a provider early gave me peace of mind and guidance when I needed it.
Motherhood is messy, beautiful, and complicated. Being a military spouse made it even more challenging for me, but I learned that leaning on support and trusting myself was the key to surviving (and even enjoying!) those early weeks. Remember, ups and downs are normal, but asking for help when something feels off is one of the bravest things you can do.
You’ve got this, and you don’t have to do it alone.
With Love and Support,
Candace Stewart, RN, CLC
Compass Doula & Lactation PLLC